Do you have any fetishes? Will you tell us about them; what they are, why you enjoy them, maybe how you developed them? Are you ashamed or embarrassed by them or are you happy to be open about them? Do you think they are unusual?
Where to start with this question! It’s one of these subjects I could ramble for hours about but when it comes to writing it down I just don’t know where to start!
I guess I’ve always had fetishes(really dislike that word as it seems to imply strange somehow) and kinks right back to when I first started having sex a quarter of a century ago.
I guess my main thing has always been D/s. Now in fairness, I’ve never really considered this a kink or fetish. To me it’s just who I am. I get off on trust and control. Pretty much from the first time I had sex I always felt the need to be in control of my partner. It was a couple of years before I discovered the name for it and began to explore further, finding out that my naturally protective nature was not only welcomed but essentially a huge part of the dynamic. I guess that is the root of it all.
As I progressed it moved onto rope and shibari which is something I enjoy immensely. It’s the aspect of total restraint, total control that I love.
Knife play has been quite a big part of my kink for a very long time too. I’ve always been fascinated by them. I guess it once again comes down to the total control aspect. Also of course is the total level of trust involved in this kind of play, your sub/bottom is trusting you with not only their physical well-being but potentially their life!
It’s a pretty taboo subject however. Wasn’t until fairly recently a good friend mentioned that it was a huge trigger for her so knives are something I tend not to be quite so open about these days.
Impact play is another thing I’ve always been into, right back to almost the earliest days of my sex life. It was initially just good old fashioned spanking. Then of course through time and experimentation moving onto floggers, crops, canes and my very favourite, the humble but evocative belt. I was and always will be fascinated by the different marks they leave behind. All serving the same purpose and all saying the same thing……mine.
Add things like forced orgasm/denial/control, biting, a healthy dose of S&M and I think it’s fair to say I have a fairly extensive list of fetishes. I remember a while back when I was on fetlife, the list, when viewed on the screen actually surprised even me! Of course that’s not to say I don’t enjoy a healthy dollop of vanilla. Let’s be honest, it’s not all floggers. Sometimes you just wanna cuddle(kinky bugger I am)!
As for being open about things, yes I am up to a point. Most of my friends know about part of what I get up to, in the Dominance sense anyway. I obviously don’t go into details. Apart from anything else it takes too damn long to explain the finer points of everything! As for being embarrassed, I can honestly say I am not. I’ve never seen anything I do as usual. It’s just a small part of who I am. With the exception of control, trust and protection I’d say there were none of these things essential to my enjoyment of sex, they are just an enhancement.