Merry Christmas to you. I miss you and love you more than you will ever know or my words could ever fully express🖤🥀
By way of something a little different here’s a few things I recorded while working on my own music. It’s a bit different to my usual style and it’s recorded on my phone so like me, bad quality and rough as hell but from the heart! For my favourite hooman 🖤
Every rose has it’s thorn
More than words
Can’t believe December has arrived already! It’s been a strange sort of year it has to be said. For most of the year I can say this was the best year of my life. I’ve honestly never known happiness like it. The wheels kinda came off things in October though. Then a fortnight ago it really got worse.
After a particularly heavy booze binge I found myself in hospital with alcohol poisoning and a blood alcohol level which the doctor described as usually lethal. The frightening fact was that for a brief time I did stop breathing. There was no bright lights or wonderous visions just nothing but me apparently mumbling the same name over and over as I slipped out of consciousness. All in all a pretty damn ignominious way to round out the year. I’m happy to say though I’ve been lucky and there seems to be no damage done other than to my pride.
I suppose my stupidity just goes to remind me that no matter how bad things look it can certainly always be worse. Not to mention the fact that I’m not as young as I used to be and really have to be more careful. Lesson painfully learned. So just remember, life is fleeting. Hold the one you love tight and don’t ever let them go. Be kind to each other but perhaps more importantly, be kind to yourself.
I hope the festive season brings y’all all you desire.
Yet arms always open on return
And the mess when the same thing happens
When I should have acted differently
Bringing doubts of old
Demons of the past
Long since slaughtered
And deep down knowing
Could never again exist
Things that look beyond repair
Are always fixable
And the invisible thread stretches
But despite everything refuses to break
The things that can never be deleted
From the heart and soul
Afraid to feel more pain
Yet enduring it daily
Because some pain never fades with time
Despite what we tell ourselves
When sleep is no longer an escape
And the face and scent still present in the night
And the inability to quit fighting
For the only thing worth fighting for
No lies, no web of deceit
Just imperfect thoughts and actions
The corrosion, the toxicity
Of self doubt and insecurity
The sense of misunderstanding and loss
And dreams not yet fulfilled
Even when hovering between
Here and beyond
My last breath
Used to say your name
At that point where failures hurts more
And the safety net breaks temporarily
The few outweigh the many
And nothing makes sense anymore
Love should be enough
But mistakes hurt
Wishing every ten minutes
Could last a lifetime
A picture painted in words and music
No photograph required
All the things
He’s no longer able to say again
Still counting sleeps in his mind
To convince himself he’s fine
The thing that will never fade
His heart’s only desire
No matter what time passes
He writes the songs
That no one else will hear
The numbness consumes
But never completely enough
Happiness turns to maudlin tears
Hopes and dreams to dust
No amount of whisky
Can drown out the feelings
Can hide the image of the face at night
And the sleep that never comes
The memory of the voice
And the laugh that mended a broken soul
Of mistakes made for the right reasons
Or what should be aeternum
Leaves no happy ending once more
But all the time screaming inside
But the only war worth fighting
Is the one that can’t be won
Until the Babylon candle burns bright
And the yellow light blinks once more
After this week’s TMI Tuesday you may say, “Get out of my head!”
The Psychology of Sex
1. For you, can sex be separated from love?
Undoubtedly but in my experience the best sex usually comes about when there is love or at least a pretty deep connection.
2. Can sex be separated from caring?
Again it’s a yes and the answer to question one could apply equally here too.
3. Men: Does sex seem to be something that you can never get enough of and are constantly seeking or thinking about?
I’m blessed (or cursed depending on the situation) with a very high sex drive and it seems to have increased ten fold since I’ve been with my girl! It’s definitely something I can never get enough of. As for constantly thinking about it, I can’t say it rules my life in that respect.
4. Women: Is sex secondary to intimacy, physical closeness, and commitment?
I can’t speak for my girl but I know that sex is as hugely important to her as it is to me.
5. Who is more discriminating in choosing sexual partners–you or your significant other?
We are both pretty discriminating when it comes to that.
Bonus: Who is more likely to take on additional sexual partners, you or your significant other?
Neither of us. I have been monogamous most of my life and my girl is the same.
More TMI here